"Sweet Trav" (thespunbearing)
10/17/2014 at 14:20 • Filed to: Why Your Car Sucks
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"Sweet Trav" (thespunbearing)
10/17/2014 at 14:20 • Filed to: Why Your Car Sucks | 10
| 15 |
Some people are fans of the Mercedes-Benz AMG GT. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Mercedes-Benz AMG GT. This 2014 tongue-in-cheek car "review" is for those in the latter group.
This is part of an ongoing series of articles I will be writing using the formula laid out by Drew Magary on Deadspin.
Your Car: 2016 AMG GT S
Your 2016 Model Year Vital Stats: Two Turbochargers. A torque curve flatter than Bonneville. 7 Speeds. 47/53 weight distribution. Flappy paddles. It has both a "Hot inside V" and "Dry Sump" which sound more like hideous medical conditions than a turbocharger and oiling system configuration.
Your Engine: M178 4.0 liter dual overhead cam biturbo V8
I am woefully disappointed by this engine. If a Rube Goldberg machine was ever made, it is the power plant within the AMG GT.
First let's take a look at the block itself. It's a 4.0L 90 degree V8 with an 83MM bore and 92MM stroke, those of you who know about engines can see from the under-square design, we're not off to a good start for a sports car engine. It does have the patented NANOSLIDE cylinder bore treatment given to all of Mercedes FI engines for the 2014 season, which makes the bores harder than even cast iron bore liners while saving weight, too bad the F1 conditioned bore is so small.
Next let's look at the cylinder heads, Modern MBZ design here, Dual overhead cams, Variable Valve Timing and plumbed for direct injection cast from a Zirconium Alloy. The Induction system is where things go kaput. First compared to a traditional V8 design the hot side of the engine, the exhaust manifolds are in where the intake manifold would be, Here Mercedes has stuck two turbochargers in a Biturbo configuration, This is the "Hot Inside V" referenced earlier which next to the camshaft slang of "Bumpstick" is the most sexually suggestive automotive term ever. These turbos spin up to 186,000 RPM to force 17 PSI down the bores of this four liter engine. With the added squish of a 10.5-1 compression ratio, normal port injection would out of the question with that much boost, so Mercedes turned to fancy third generation piezo-style direct injection that can deliver fuel into the combustion chamber at 2,900 PSI. So why have I laid out all the technology and German engineering that goes into this supposed Wunderkind?
The engine makes only 503 HP at 6250 RPM and 479 Ft-lbs of torque. Let that sink in, two turbos, four camshafts, the best technology and metallurgy available and that the best Mercedes AMG Can do? This Teutonic turd of an engine is not only heavier, but makes less power than the naturally aspirated pushrod powered LS7 that will have debuted over 8 years before the AMG GT hits the streets. You might say that "Well the LS7 is a seven liter monster, this isn't a fair comparison." It is a larger displacement engine, but keep in mind at wide open throttle the M178 will use more air and fuel than an 8 liter V8 with the 17 pounds of boost shoe horned in. Even BMW and Audi have built better more powerful sub-5l Turbo Engines. Some might even say that this engine is "under-rated" and that Brabus or another outside tuner will tune one thousand and some odd horsepower out of it. I don't see that happening for two reasons, first the "Hot Inside V" setup limits the size of the turbo you could bolt to this engine, second, at 10.5-1 compression and 17psi of boost the engine is already at the cusp of what can be accomplished on pump gas, even with direct injection. This engine then isn't the German car tuner's kinky wet dream, it's a bit more Hausfrau than Red Light district.
The real disappointment is that the M178 is essentially two M133 four pots conjoined at the crank. The M133 2.0 I4 is an absolute monster of a 4 banger with 355hp/335 ft-lbs of torque. It would then stand then to reason that the M178 would be somewhere north of 650 horsepower and 600 ft/lbs of torque. For all its technology and German engineering this engine is far more 99 Luftballons than it is Rammstein. The use of this engine is hilarious considering the much lighter and compact 662HP M159 sitting on the shelf at MB. Once again a "premium" manufacturer has made a car less good, than it could have been; probably just to release an AMG GT63 Black Edition, which is a bunch of turbocharged marketing horseshit.
Your Aesthetics Recipe: In a keg, combine in equal parts: Ass end of Porsche 911, Roof-line of an F-Type Jag, the A pillar forward of a Dodge Viper, and a dash of Myth of German reliability. Seal in keg between September 29th and April 23rd. Tap Keg and serve in a traditional German beer stein between Sept 19th and Oct. 4th. Be sure to garnish stein with stupid LED fairylamps, Teutonic Arrogance and a gopping big Mercedes logo so everyone knows exactly what brand you drink. Consume enough until you forget that its just a bland concatenation of three cars, just as Märzen is a bland boring beer. Then drink more because Oktoberfest, Bruder!
What's new that sucks: Getting back to marketing, Mercedes new marketing strategy is akin to "We build the best or nothing at all." I'm sorry but does Mercedes build anything that can be considered best in its class anymore? Maybe you could make the argument for the S Class considering the current BMW 7 series is so long in the tooth. But as far as performance cars go, Mercedes doesn't even have a vehicle in the top 20 of Nurburgring lap times, to put this in perspective plebian manufactures like Nissan, Dodge and Chevy all have cars in the Top 20. Granted a lap time isn't a complete measure of a car, it is only indicative of performance, or how quick it is over one of the most grueling tracks in the world, which might be important to someone in the market for I don't know… a sports car. If I were an exec at Mercedes, I'd find this especially concerning considering the main rival of the AMG GT is the Porsche 911. Porsche has two vehicles in the top 10 by the way. But is the 911 really the competitor to the AMG GT? What about the F-type? Or maybe even the Corvette Z06? In many ways the AMG GT is just a more expensive German Corvette knock off with a significantly worse engine, crappy gearbox and the unforgivable lack of a three pedal manual option. Think about it: front-mid engine, Transmission at the back, V8, 2 seater. If someone asked me what car used that configuration, I'd immediately answer with the Corvette. I like to think of the AMG GT like the band The Scorpions, undoubtedly German but far more American in execution than anyone would have guessed.
What has always sucked: It's a Mercedes, so everything electronic will fail catastrophically the second Sunday after the warranty ends costing you $58,352 in repairs, your first born, or a picture of you in lederhosen as collateral blackmail if you finance your repair bill. I can't help but feel like most "premium sports cars" like the 911, Viper and F-Type the AMG GT will primarily be driven by knob-end lawyers, finance dweebs, and the real housewives of Long Island, which is a damn shame and blight on any car designed to be thrashed around a track. Also what's with the tablet they just glued on the dash for the infotainment system? It doesn't go at all with the cockpit inspired design of the interior.
What might not suck: Is it underrated? What can Brabus do with this engine? Will it make the 700-ish horsepower it should in a true twin turbo form? How fast is this car compared to a comparable 911? Mercedes makes a car that is very nice, comfortable, and performs admirably, but it will make you smile as much a German comedian. I really truly hope that this car, unlike previous Merc sports cars, has a soul and personality in spades. It doesn't have to perfect to be great; it just has to be a good time. Which as we all know from German History, their idea of a good time is invading your neighbors, I hope for Poland's sake they have learned new and different ways to cut loose.
Next time on Why your Car Sucks: Time to head back to 'Murica, Dearborn Michigan specifically, to bring the 2015 Mustang down a peg or two.
Share your opinions in the Comment Section Below. Remember, this is all in good fun.
Travis - King of Spun Bearings is not a king, author, journalist or even a part-time fanfic writer. Instead he spends his days driving his classic Chevrolet across SE-Michigan and his quiet nights at home drinking cheap whiskey and listening to The Scorpions. Occasionally he has a valid idea or opinion which he feels must be shared on the internet. You can reach him at thespunbearing@outlook.com
For Sweden
> Sweet Trav
10/17/2014 at 14:29 |
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It's shocking that people think turbos are efficient at full ludicrous boost.
kanadanmajava1
> Sweet Trav
10/17/2014 at 14:29 |
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You got the name of wrong. It's not Mercedes-Benz AMG GT. For some really weird reason they call it Mercedes-AMG GT.
But I'm not big fan of it either. It probably drives well but its not made for me (and I couldn't even afford it).
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Sweet Trav
> For Sweden
10/17/2014 at 14:31 |
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Sweet Trav
> kanadanmajava1
10/17/2014 at 14:33 |
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And even then, would you rather have a Z06 or an AMG GT?
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Sweet Trav
> kanadanmajava1
10/17/2014 at 14:34 |
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I think technically the full name would be Merecedes-Benz, Mercedes-AMG GT, that is unless Mercedes-AMG has its own VIN indicator.
macanamera
> Sweet Trav
10/17/2014 at 14:48 |
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Bbtter than Mercedes-Benz CLS63 S-AMG 4MATIC
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kanadanmajava1
> Sweet Trav
10/17/2014 at 14:51 |
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I think that VIN only tells the manufacturer name which is Daimler AG. They used to be Daimler-Benz and for short time Daimler-Chrysler but ditched the second name from the manufacturer name after Chrysler separated. All three had different VIN code. But the brand name doesn't have any separation in VIN.
But for some season the truck/bus division is still going with the Daimler-Benz manufacturer name and use the old VIN code. I guess they kept it separated during the Daimler-Chrysler times.
I think that this is the first car that they have made that has Mercedes in the name but not Benz.
Nighthawkwill7, Hoon Depot Manager
> Sweet Trav
10/17/2014 at 14:52 |
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Would rather have the Jag over this but I'd rather have a Stingray over the Jag. If you bring the Z06 into the fray then the choice because even easier.
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Sweet Trav
> Nighthawkwill7, Hoon Depot Manager
10/17/2014 at 14:54 |
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I'd take the 'Vette over this every day of the week and twice on Sunday, but on Tuesday, I'd consider the Jaaaaaag.
Remember dialing "popcorn" for the time?
> Sweet Trav
10/17/2014 at 15:34 |
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Is it the Mercedes-Benz Mercedes-AMG GT die Mercedes-AMG GT?
mr2gud2u
> For Sweden
10/17/2014 at 16:24 |
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A turbo make everything faster and more efficient right. That's what manufacturers want us to believe at lease.
K-Roll-PorscheTamer
> Sweet Trav
10/17/2014 at 20:22 |
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You sir, are a fucking genius. I love reading these. Drinks are on me(if I could buy them)
Connor Jones
> Sweet Trav
10/23/2014 at 05:23 |
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Another great review. I'm kind of worried about what you're going to say about the 2015 mustang, because I have been defending the I4 in comment sections for months now (I own a merkur xr4ti, so it's probably not surprising I defend I4 turbos).
Mark Soliman
> Sweet Trav
06/23/2015 at 09:34 |
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https://www.facebook.com/MercedesLawsof…
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Aleksei
> Sweet Trav
08/29/2015 at 15:17 |
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I do have to come out in defense of this car, mostly because I came pretty close to buying the argument that it was crap; but just like in previous reviews it isn’t entirely fair.
For starters, this isn’t actually exactly a 2x replica of the M133. The M133 has a lower compression ratio, and a mind-boggling 26 PSI of boost — 50% higher than the 17 that the M178 produces. So yes, the M178 is likely underrated. Add M133 pistons and another turbo, and we’re in business.
As for the lack of a competitive Nurburgring time, while that is in fact important to a car of this class, that’s not really the point of Mercedes sports cars, whatever their marketing arm might claim. That’s not why you buy a Merc, and it doesn’t necessarily mark the final word on whether a sports car is best in class. After all, Aston Martin doesn’t have any top-20 cars either, but that’s not why you buy an Aston so it doesn’t matter.
What Mercedes-Benz sports cars are, is the best compromise in their class between performance and luxury/refinement. In their way they've always been a bit bonkers and excessive, but mostly that has to do with the fact they follow the muscle car formula (take a big comfy car and add the hugest engine you can find), and thus drive like muscle cars. The AMG-GT may not have the track credentials, but it's the only car in its class with active engine mounts, and in general it compromises the least to comfort, while still having completely confidence inspiring handling. That's an achievement.